tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2052804833047039552024-02-07T23:18:04.713+00:00What Sophie SaidLifestyle blog. Optimist, list-maker, planner, living out my current adventure in Chester. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.comBlogger328125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-12045289808124770492018-05-04T16:23:00.001+01:002018-05-04T16:23:33.732+01:00Writing fiction as a way to move forwards.Last week I shared a bit about <a href="http://what-sophie-said.blogspot.co.uk/2018/04/my-short-story-is-in-anthology.html" target="_blank">the writing course</a> that led to me writing my short story, Aftershock.<br />
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Today I thought I'd share a bit about what it was about, and the process of writing it.<br />
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I had planned to write it slowly, leaving myself lots of editing time and really making use of the month or so we were given.<br />
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In fact, I wrote most of it in one sitting, on a single afternoon when I most definitely should have been doing other things. The words just kept coming and I didn't want to cut them off.<br />
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I based my story on something that had actually happened to me, as one of the things recommended on the course was that it could be easier to get inside a character or situation if it was something you knew and understood.<br />
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I share a lot on this blog and I'm incredibly open about my journey with anxiety and depression, but one of the big things I haven't spoken about was something that happened to me in October 2016, when I was living and working in London.<br />
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It happened right in the middle of my course of CBT, the day the occupational therapist had recommended I'd be able to return to my normal working hours, and the day after a wonderful weekend away which left me feeling in a really good place.<br />
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For some reason, it's an incident I haven't written about on here, which has frustrated me as writing about things on here is one of the methods I use to work through things and to get them out of my head and sort of tick off having moved through them.<br />
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I tried to write about it multiple times, but instead of letting it out my brain decided flashbacks and prolonged panic in certain situations was a better option.<br />
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At some point during the writing course, the idea came to me of trying to use fiction as a way to work through what had happened, if my usual method of writing on here wouldn't work. With fiction, I could give the story a different ending.<br />
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The next day, flicking through the notes on my phone, I found some words I wrote at that time. I was sitting in an Uber and wrote a few paragraphs in the notes app on my phone. They were about emptiness and putting on a mask and trying to cope.<br />
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Nothing felt more appropriate than using my words from those days following the incident to open my story.<br />
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Once those words were on the page, the story flowed out of me. I started with the feelings on the days after what had happened. I then flashed back to a few days earlier, to the day a man ran towards me on busy Oxford Street. To the strangers making a circle around me, all trying to push this man away as he lunged at me again and again. To everything that followed.<br />
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In my story, I then had the power to move forwards. I jumped ahead in time and I wrote the story a new ending. I was able to use the frame of fiction to think about why this man had behaved that way. A way to make peace with the fact he was never caught.<br />
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I suppose you could say that it was a sort of therapy. Since the day I submitted the story, the memories of that day have become so much less frequent.<br />
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In combination with that, I had the satisfaction of having completed a short story, after years of having no confidence in writing fiction.<br />
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It was an emotional writing process, but I must have let some things out I'd been holding onto tightly. And I don't think I'll be staying away from writing fiction for too long...<br />
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Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-43934915499564498692018-05-01T16:58:00.003+01:002018-05-01T16:58:37.550+01:00Hello, May 2018The last couple of months feel like they've lasted approximately one week each, maximum.<br />
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April was absolutely packed, and I'm hoping the pace might slow a little this month in terms of running here, there and everywhere in order to focus on hitting some goals.<br />
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I've not yet made any definite action steps towards my goal of getting back on a plane this year, so we need to look at some dates and a plan for that, and the keyboard hasn't exactly been a focus yet, either!<br />
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I also had one of my biggest business months yet in April, so have some even bigger goals for May.<br />
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We are back into the swing of things at the theatre group, now rehearsing for our July show which is a comedy and the group of young people in it have grasped the concept with both hands and are running with it, it's very encouraging and exciting.<br />
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There are some lovely friends coming to visit this month which I'm really looking forward to, and I'm also properly back into the swing of making working out and better eating a priority.<br />
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So that's the focus this month: slow down a tiny bit and really focus in on some goals and getting things ticked off to be really proud of!<br />
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Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-18634550663174130742018-04-27T11:48:00.002+01:002018-04-27T11:48:52.941+01:00My short story is in an anthologyIn Autumn 2017, I took myself out of my comfort zone and joined a creative writing class.<br />
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As a result of that course, I've got a short story printed in a real life book.<br />
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How on earth did that happen?<br />
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About six months ago I was flicking through the local paper and something drew my eye to the tiniest little article. It was a good few pages in, only a couple of paragraphs long and with no attached image. It said that Cheshire West and Chester Council had received Arts Council Grants for the Arts funding to run four workshops for adults across their libraries.<br />
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There was a contact phone number, and one was to take place at Storyhouse (a.k.a. one of my favourite places in Chester).<br />
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Usually I'd spot things like this and either ignore them or file them away for later and then be too late or never get around to taking action.<br />
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For some reason, this day was different and I just picked up the phone.<br />
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A couple of weeks later, I sat at a table with about 15 other people, of all ages and backgrounds, and we launched into our first session, led by Charles.<br />
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There was a focus on group discussion, on everyone throwing out ideas and at looking at the skills involved in creative writing and short stories.<br />
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When I was little, I used to write stories all the time. I didn't stick at any long enough to finish them, but starting stories or writing random snippets inspired by other things I'd read was one of my favourite things to do.<br />
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I vividly remember writing a short story about pirates in year 3, getting seven gold stars for it and having to go and read it out to the headmaster and the year sixes - easily one of my proudest (and scariest) school memories!<br />
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At some point, all of that stopped. I got it into my head that creative writing 'wasn't my thing' and I lost my confidence.<br />
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Spending time with a group like this, of all abilities and ages, meant there was no space for fear. Our discussions were more about the writing process and what we enjoyed reading, rather than anyone feeling they had to share writing of their own if they weren't ready.<br />
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When the eight-week course ended, we had a month to write a 2000 word story (if we wanted to) and submit it to be part of the anthology.<br />
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I was expecting one of those funny little books that look like a book but are pretty poor quality without the best printing.<br />
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In fact, it's a really beautiful, professional looking book packed with stories from participants across the four libraries.<br />
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Opening that contents page to find what page my story was on was the most surreal feeling. There was my name, in black print, and I turned to page 140.<br />
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There it was. There it is.<br />
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We've all got copies of the book and could order any extras we wanted, and there will be copies across the libraries where the workshops took place.<br />
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I just think it's so incredible we all had the chance to do this completely free of charge thanks to funding and the council. We need to cherish spaces like libraries and embrace opportunities like this, encouraging those who run them and support them to continue.<br />
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I'm going to write a separate post about the process of writing my story and the topic I chose, because there's a lot to that and it's had quite an impact on me since.<br />
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Watch this space...<br />
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<br />Sophie x<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-90315136424342622482018-04-26T14:50:00.007+01:002018-04-26T14:50:59.959+01:00The Reading List #52It's time for my next round-up of mini reviews...<br />
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This time, a life upgrade, money talk, a trip to Kenya and a twist on a classic fairytale.<br />
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<u>Leopard at the Door, Jennifer McVeigh</u><br />
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18 year-old Rachel has returned home to Kenya after six years at an English boarding school. Her father's new lover has moved onto the farm and times are changing. Outside the farm, rumours are growing of violence between Mau Mau freedom fighters and British soldiers.<br />
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I absolutely loved this novel. I love using fiction as a way to explore places and situations I know little or nothing about and I felt completely immersed in this world. It was a pleasure to read, with amazing characters and made me gasp out loud in places. The historical note at the end was also well worth a read, and I was shocked at the examples given of the power of the media and media perspective.<br />
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<u>Money: Master the Game, Tony Robbins</u><br />
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I'm a huge Tony Robbins fan, and the focus of this book is pretty obvious from the title. It's about the steps towards financial freedom, and contains lots of case studies and motivation and explanation of the way things work in the financial world.<br />
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Unfortunately, because the advice was so specific I feel it has dated, and it's also very America-specific as financial processes and offerings differ from country to country and from year to year. There were some interesting concepts and I enjoyed the parts where he was speaking about money and attitudes towards money, but a lot of the information wasn't relevant to me.<br />
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<u>A Whole New World - A Twisted Tale, Liz Braswell</u><br />
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'What if Aladdin had never found the lamp?'<br />
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This is part of a whole series of tales offering twists on the stories we all know and love. They're written in that distinctive fairytale style and do feel like a sort of parallel version oft he original stories, rather than being totally different.<br />
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Aladdin isn't one of my favourite Disney tales so this one didn't resonate with me as much as some of the others in this series, but what I did like was that this story felt much more meaty and full-bodied than the story we all know. I enjoyed thinking about the effect of changing one detail of a story and the knock-on effect that could have.<br />
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<u>Leap Year, Helen Russell</u><br />
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This is one woman's story of a year-long 'life upgrade'. Broken down into sections including home, finances and career, she tries out techniques commonly believed to help improve your life and talks to various 'experts' in each of these practices.<br />
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It's a light-hearted read about feeling a bit stuck and wanting to do something about it. However, it's written by someone at such a different stage of life to me that I found it hard to relate. It was a good reminder, though, that whatever your circumstances are, you're able to make a change.<br />
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That's it for this round-up, but there will be more mini reviews on the way soon...<br />
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Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-40909065083661021072018-04-25T20:57:00.000+01:002018-04-25T20:57:08.645+01:00Learning to go with the flow'Going with the flow' has never been one of my strengths. As I've got older, that talent got even smaller. I like control, I like set timings and I like knowing what's going on.<br />
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There's plenty of times where that's an asset. I'm on time for things, I don't miss meetings and appointments and I usually get things done.<br />
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However, it can become incredibly restrictive and put a huge amount of pressure both on myself and on those I'm spending my time with.<br />
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I'd insist on knowing the exact schedule of a day and then a tiny shift in those plans (whether or not it was controllable or not) would send me into a panic or get me very frustrated.<br />
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It's something I've wanted to change for a long time, and recently I've found it's sort of happening by accident. I guess it must be related to me feeling less anxious overall and feeling less uptight about everything.<br />
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I'm more comfortable arriving on time, or five minutes early. I'm more confident that I can time a journey properly.<br />
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I've also more consciously tried to not let a change in plans completely throw my entire day, or even week (which is where I was sometimes at). I try to quickly get back on top of things and reassess where I'm at and if and how that will affect other things I've got going on.<br />
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In the moment, if I do start to flap, I've really found deep breathing helps. There was a time when someone suggesting that to me would make me roll my eyes as it sounds too simple. In fact, it's actually pretty hard to do when panic escalates.<br />
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I've spent the last year or so really focusing on meditation and yoga, which has strengthened my ability to then use that deep breathing in the moments I need it. It takes practice, but it's a skill worth developing.<br />
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I suppose what I'm trying to say is that I'm realising how unhealthy it is to feel the need to have absolute control over everything in my days and weeks. At the end of the day, life is unpredictable and people are, too.<br />
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Plans shifting is a fact of life, and so I've needed to learn to cope with that.<br />
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Don't get me wrong, I still prefer a plan and I'll never lose my need for a plan completely, but then thing I CAN work on is the way I react if things do shift.<br />
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It's a work in progress, but I'm starting to notice a real difference.<br />
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Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-57476829288797550522018-04-19T14:52:00.001+01:002018-04-19T14:52:29.544+01:00A few days away.My brain still does some odd things as I approach a trip away. It's one of the leftover things I still need to deal with when it comes to anticipation with my anxiety, and the confusion between excitement and nerves.<br />
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Before I go away, such as for the Leeds and York trip a couple of weeks ago, I get so excited but also have a knot of nerves in my stomach.<br />
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It used to be that I was nervous about the journey, what I could eat, breaking routine, not knowing where I was... thankfully those things are no longer the primary things playing on my mind.<br />
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However, I get this strange sensation of the trip being some kind of deadline.<br />
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In the days leading up to leaving, I feel an intense pressure to tick off every single job on my to do list, including the things that are much longer term goals.<br />
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There's a sense of 'running out of time', even though a few days later I'll be back to my normal routine and can continue working on the longer term projects.<br />
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It's as if a part of me thinks I won't be able to relax and enjoy the trip if there's anything at all left to be done at home, which is ridiculous both because I could never physically achieve this and because I have the examples of so many other trips that I've relaxed into and loved despite this fact!<br />
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I seem to worry that having a few days out of my normal routine, where I'm not ticking things off my day to day to do list, will have a hugely negative effect. In fact, the exact opposite is probably true as it's good for us all to take a break and enjoy time away from the norm.<br />
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I think it comes from the comfort I was able to find in the past in making lists and sticking to patterns. Despite the fact that these things were not serving me well in the long term, in the short term they helped me to believe I was retaining some level of control despite my anxiety.<br />
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Even now the anxiety is nothing like it once was, these are thought patterns I acted on for many years, so it makes sens that it's taking time to shift them all.<br />
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Whenever I do actually go away, I am able to switch off and enjoy the trip, so in that sense I'm pleased, because it doesn't affect the trip itself.<br />
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I now just need to work on the days leading up to it, and stamp out this sense of urgency that attaches to things that have no deadline at all.<br />
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The thing I keep reminding myself is that nerves and excitement are very similar emotions and I think sometimes my brain still gets a bit confused between the two. For so long fear was the default setting, so it's going to take a little while to flip that pattern.<br />
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Changes are happening, and that's one of the ones that still needs a bit of work.<br />
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So that's what I'm working on.<br />
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Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-89867844079430168402018-04-13T13:11:00.000+01:002018-04-13T13:11:01.370+01:00Mixtape, Royal Exchange Theatre's Young Company<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>It's a return guest visit on the blog today - my dad's been to another amazing show and couldn't resist sharing his review. Read on for the tale of a wonderful night at The Royal Exchange.</i></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"><br /></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">Mixtape </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">‘It’s theatre in the round, Jim, but not as we know it’</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"><br /></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I’m a big fan of The Royal Exchange, Manchester and well used to sitting in a circle, with the players directly in front of me. But last night I was encircled by the cast, rather than the other way around. Because last night I went to see Mixtape – a new musical created and performed by the Young Company of this awesome theatre.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The Young Company has just won Stage School of the Year 2018 and it’s not hard to see why. It includes a range of young people, from 14 to 25 who all collaborated to produce what was an exceptional show.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I use the word show because the overall experience of last night is quite difficult to define. We entered the arena and it felt like we’d gained admission to a nightclub. Cast members were already in attendance and music was playing in the background as we stood around wondering just what was going to happen next. One of the cast came and had a chat with us, asking where we were from and how far we’d travelled.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Lights went down briefly and then the ‘real’ show began, this with a poetic monologue, followed by a pulsating song based around living in Manchester and being part of the hive. It’s fair to say that Manchester took centre stage in this production, which was in many ways a homage to the city and a celebration of its diverse community with its power to draw you in and make you feel that not only are you a part of it, but that you own a part of it too.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This was a theme which was picked up by many characters throughout the show and one couldn’t help but recall the sad events of last May, a time when Manchester demonstrated its togetherness, this time in adversity, with many brought together at that time through the poetry of Tony Welsh. Tony has apparently seen this show and given it a big thumbs-up.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">So, what else happened in the 75-minute, no interval show? Well, there were some super songs, some marvellous monologues, some excellent encounters, some vibrant verses and some polished performances all round.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Some of the singing was sublime and much of the script was thought-provoking and deep. But it was all played out in an atmosphere of warmth, good humour and inclusivity, something which being in the round or perhaps even being surrounded, really helped to engender.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We laughed, we sang, we cried (well some of us did, but not so anyone else would notice), we even became part of a dance-off. And when the main show was over we were invited back in for the after-party, so we could chat to some of the members of the cast and crew.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Oh, what a night it was at the Royal Exchange. This was not just a celebration of Manchester, it was a celebration of young people and of creativity in general. And in amongst all of this I’ve learnt a brand-new word, sonder, and a brand-new movement, The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Because it turns out that the name of the band in the show, The Sonders, was not just chosen at random. Sonder is defined in the above-named dictionary as the realisation that each random passer-by is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">And this was indeed what the show was all about.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">In an ensemble piece I have to say that everyone played their part in making this such an enjoyable evening. As for stand-out performances, well Zoe Ndlovu’s voice is loaded with richness, Grace Collard sang very sweetly whilst playing her ukulele, Isah Levi-Roach did a fine rap in a duet with Zoe, and Charlie Shaw struck me as having lots of potential as a singer and an actor. Meanwhile Elli Kypriadi pulled the whole thing together, with a strong performance as narrator and general leader.</span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As for the beat of Manchester, well that was mainly provided by Aidan Feely, the son of a friend and the reason I ended up going to see this show in the first place. Nice work Aidan, and great monologue to boot.</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The show ends this Saturday night and from what I hear, you might struggle to get a ticket. Word on the Manchester streets though, is that future performances might take place later in the year, this time potentially outdoors.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span id="docs-internal-guid-799e6698-bee4-c27d-0997-00778207d68e"></span></span><br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If I were you I’d keep those ears peeled – this show rocked!</span></span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-89307639578206625552018-04-10T19:47:00.001+01:002018-04-10T19:47:17.601+01:00A day trip to YorkI've got an interesting relationship with York.<br />
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I went there for university in 2010 and at first couldn't believe my luck. I'd wander around the city centre so grateful that I'd moved to such a beautiful city.<br />
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I met some great people and have some really fond memories of parts of my time there.<br />
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However, my whole experience there wasn't rosy, and by the time I left in 2013 I had a very different picture of the place.<br />
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My mental health had taken a bad turn and that combined with other factors meant I left university in a pretty wobbly place.<br />
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I'd retreated into my shell and the Sophie who set off to university was not the same person who emerged at the other end.<br />
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I'm so proud of my degree (English Literature) and there are parts of my time there I loved, but York ended up carrying the weight of some very tricky memories and a lot of struggle, anxiety and sadness.<br />
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Since graduating in 2013, I've only returned once for a couple of hours, where I pretty much went to one coffee shop and left again.<br />
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Last week, I returned to York.<br />
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Despite the fact the weather on the surrounding days was awful, Friday was bright and breezy with not a drop of rain.<br />
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We wandered the streets of the city centre and the Shambles.<br />
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We went to the Castle Museum, to stroll down the Victorian Street and explore the prison.<br />
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We tasted our way through York's Chocolate Story.<br />
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We ate great food.<br />
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We visited York Minster in all its beauty.<br />
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We tracked down my old favourite cupcake shop and met the new, lovely owners.<br />
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I fell back in love with York all over again.<br />
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I've replaced those memories of struggle and defeat and retreat with happiness.<br />
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I've restored my first picture of York: a beautiful, historic city full of so much character and wonderful people.<br />
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It was more than just a day trip. It was a day of correcting those memories which had got a bit tainted along the way.<br />
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It was a marker of how far I've come over the past couple of years.<br />
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It was one of the best days out I've had in a long time.<br />
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Sophie x<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-35425153235950148742018-04-09T17:15:00.002+01:002018-04-09T17:15:41.374+01:00Food choices.An inevitable part of a few days away from home in hotels is eating meal after meal out in restaurants.<br />
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For nearly five years, this kind of situation would be a nightmare for me. At times the list of foods I'd eat was so small there was unlikely to be anything on any menu I could eat.<br />
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Even if it was a food I could eat at home, having it prepared by someone else in an unknown kitchen wasn't an option.<br />
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For the past few years, all of my friends have known there's a narrow selection of restaurants that are an option when we meet up for dinner, and at those places there's potentially one thing on the menu I can eat.<br />
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This made food so boring.<br />
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Gone was the enjoyment in eating out.<br />
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There was none of the excitement of choosing what to have.<br />
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It became a running joke that I'd always eat the very same meal as that was an easy way to avoid discussing the fact that it was a real issue.<br />
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My issues with food have lasted a long time and are incredibly complicated. It's the area most professionals I've seen about my anxiety and depression haven't been able to help with at all.<br />
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The problem with struggling with food is that you reinforce your unhealthy and irrational beliefs multiple times every single day, as eating food is a necessity.<br />
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Food is all around us. It's in adverts, we eat together to celebrate and we eat to stay healthy and to function.<br />
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The limited amount of ingredients I could eat has had such a huge impact on my life mentally and physically for far too long, and working on it has been a particular focus of the last year.<br />
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Every time I try a new food is a challenge, because I had ruthlessly cut out food groups due to believing they were contaminated and would make me ill. Therefore, building up to trying something new was huge, and was followed by a tense period of up to 24 hours where I waited to feel some kind of adverse effect or reaction. <br />
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Don't get me wrong, that's still the case. But the build up and tense waiting periods are decreasing in length.<br />
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I've got a running list of new foods tried and we are now past the 30 mark. (As a side note, even if I'd eaten the food all my life, I still had to go through this tense trying all over again period if I'd decided over the past few years it was no longer a safe option).<br />
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The reason I'm sharing this now is that this trip was different.<br />
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We went to a different restaurant for each meal for three days.<br />
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No repeats.<br />
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I ordered a different meal at every restaurant.<br />
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No repeats.<br />
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I enjoyed my food.<br />
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I tried three new foods whilst away, without the comfort of preparing them myself at home.<br />
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Anyone who has been close to me over the last few years knows how enormous this is.<br />
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It's huge. It's such progress.<br />
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It's the next step in a journey towards fully enjoying food again, to letting it nourish my body and to being able to relax and have fun when eating out with others.<br />
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It's a step in my journey towards better mental and physical health.<br />
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It's taken and is taking a huge amount of work, but I'm doing it.<br />
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And it's working.<br />
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Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-16843190026965659602018-04-05T07:00:00.003+01:002018-04-05T07:00:56.037+01:00A Wrinkle in TimeOver the Bank Holiday weekend we went to see Disney's latest film offering, <i>A Wrinkle in Time</i>. It's based on a popular children's story of the same name, but I've never read that so these thoughts will be on the film in isolation, not on the way it's been adapted for the screen. I also knew nothing about the story before the film began.<br />
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Dr Alexander Murray has been missing for four years, disappearing shortly after claiming he could travel through time and the universe. His children, Meg and Charles Wallace, set off with a group of three travellers working in the fight of the light against the dark to try and find him.<br />
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There are some really wonderful messages in this film. The triumph of light over darkness, believing in yourself, empowering young people, the importance of every single individual and their place in the world, family... the list goes on.<br />
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It's got a pretty impressive cast, with the three Mrs' played by Oprah Winfrey, Reese Witherspoon and Mindy Kaling, all of whom were in incredible costumes and makeup throughout. Each of the three characters was well defined, but they were one element of the story that didn't quite work, for me. Maybe there needed to be a bit more explanation of who they actually were, or something, but it didn't quite hang together.<br />
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I really enjoyed Gugu Mbatha-Raw's performance as Dr Kate Murray. She was easy to warm to and a good balance of caring mother and successful scientist. Alongside her, though, Chris Pine's Dr Alexander Murray just didn't quite work. I liked his character in the first half of the film, but in the final half hour or so I didn't understand a lot of his motivations. He no longer seemed particularly passionate about his work, or about his family, or really about the kids after his first reunion with Meg. I thought those final scenes were a little flat, and only emotional because the concept was emotional, rather than the way he played the part.<br />
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The two absolute standouts in this film are Storm Reid (Meg Murray) and Deric McCabe (Charles Wallace Murray). Reid began as a stubborn, hurt young girl and blossomed into someone who knew her own worth - I particularly enjoyed her scene with Oprah on the bridge, being told how many amazing things had to happen in the world to create her exactly the way she is. McCabe was a really interesting character from the very beginning, but handled the part where he was taken over by the darkness especially well.<br />
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I don't quite know what it was that was missing from this film. Maybe it was just too ambitious? From reading a brief synopsis of the book it seems like that might have had some more details and explanations that could have held things together a bit more. There were emotional moments throughout, but I think my emotional reaction came from the concepts (like reuniting a family) rather than the fact the film itself pulled that emotion out of me. In terms of the overall film it just fell a little flat.<br />
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However, the overall messages and the idea of love being at the centre of all were beautiful, and it's made me want to pick up the book and really understand why it's a story loved by so many.<br />
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Sophie x<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-78999359669611724452018-04-01T07:39:00.000+01:002018-04-01T07:39:39.075+01:00Hello, April 2018I often spend these posts reflecting on the previous month, but this time I'm just going to look forward.<br />
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March was great but I've been looking forward to April for ages. It's one of my favourite months of the year because it really feels like Spring is here and Summer is on the way.<br />
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This year it starts with Easter, which means family time. It's going to be a busy, packed month by the looks of things, but full of great stuff.<br />
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There's a trip to a city I've never been and to a city I love, to the seaside at the end of the month, a singing workshop with an incredible performer, and a 10 mile charity walk.<br />
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We've already planned in lots of time with friends and family and I'm sure more of that will be slotted in as the month actually begins.<br />
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I'm also going to spend some time on good old 'life admin' as I have some more hours free thanks to the Easter break from my theatre job. That means I can get some other things ticked off and also that we can get in some good planning for the term ahead, before we get back to rehearsals towards the last part of the month.<br />
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I'm currently reading an amazing book called 'The Five Second Rule', by Mel Robbins, which honestly feels like it was written for me. I love finding books like that, and I honestly think her simple rule and concept could lead to some really great things this month.<br />
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Watch this space, because I've got a feeling this April is going to be a great one!<br />
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Sophie x<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-72755203640776146342018-03-30T21:47:00.000+01:002018-03-30T21:47:20.117+01:00Son of a Preacher Man, Storyhouse ChesterI've got to be honest, the concept and story of this musical is just not for me. It was too cheesy, too contrived and to me really wasn't a good representation of the music of Dusty Springfield. Putting that aside, though, it's performed by an immensely talented cast who performed every song brilliantly. It's a real tale of two halves, this one: I didn't like the show, but I loved those in it.<br />
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In the sixties, a record store called The Preacher Man was the place to be, and its owner was also known for his great life advice. Years later, three people - all connected to The Preacher Man in their own way - head to London to see if it's still there. Each hopes to find a solution to the dilemmas they're facing in their lives.<br />
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Let's get my main problem out of the way first, then I can write about the great aspects of the show. As might be clear from that little intro, this story is a cheesy one. It's about love, there's lots of laughs and the concept is fairly heartwarming, but if really is one of the most ridiculous storylines for a musical I've seen in a long time. It's a jukebox musical like Mamma Mia, but there's a show where it works a little better as Abba was all about flamboyance and cheese and performance, along with their catchy music.<br />
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To me, cheese is not a word I would associate with Dusty Springfield. She's so full of depth, her voice is so powerful and many of her songs are so moving that trying to fit them into a story like this was just a bit bizarre and, to me, not a good celebration of the woman she was and is remembered as. It felt like some of the songs were turned into a bit of a joke, which I just didn't find that entertaining.<br />
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If you want a cheesy afternoon out, then great, but if you want a great story, this might not be the show for you. Directed and choreographed by Craig Revel Horwood, it felt like he was trying to pack too many ideas and concepts into one show and at times made me cringe slightly.<br />
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However, as I mentioned at the beginning, the cast of this show is something special. I was blown away by the musical talent and the vocals were spot on from ensemble and principle roles alike. Songs like 'I just don't know what to do with myself', at the support group, and more of the songs in the second act really gave them a chance to show off their harmonies and the encore style section at the end sounded fantastic.<br />
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The fact many were playing instruments whilst wandering and dancing round the stage just added yet another layer of excellence to the musical performances. If I had to single out any ensemble member it would be Jess Barker, for her singing in particular.<br />
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Michael Howe played a polished Paul, a very likeable character who, although he overindulged in the cheese slightly at times, had a really wonderful voice. Lewis Kidd delivered a confident performance as Liam, managing that careful balance between making him a teenager but not overacting the 'young' stereotype. Nigel Richards' vocals (Simon) were absolutely beautiful, and I did find myself wishing he had much more to sing.<br />
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Michelle Gayle did a lovely job as Alison, sharing some intimate, caring moments with multiple other characters. You'd find it very difficult not to warm to her and her singing was very polished, with nice harmonies throughout.<br />
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Alice Barlow stole the show, for me, as Kat. Like Kidd, she struck a good balance of being young but not in a way that was too over the top or cheesy and as cliche as it sounds I really enjoyed the way she played Kat's 'journey'. She had a few moments (think waitress outfits and punch ups...) which should have been some of the ones that made me cringe the most if the rest of the show was anything to go by, but she pulled them off in a way that just had you rooting for her throughout. Her vocal performance was spot on and she really got to show that off in her final rendition of Son of a Preacher Man, which was very impressive.<br />
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I really enjoyed the fact that the encore and bows section at the end was long, as it gave audiences a chance to appreciate every single cast member, each of whom had their own bow. When the talent level is so high, it's nice to be able to appreciate more than only the main roles.<br />
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So really it was quite an interesting afternoon! The show itself and the story could not have been further away from what I enjoy, but the talent of the performers was so impressive that I was able to just sit back and enjoy each song as if that's all I was there to see, rather than a complete musical.<br />
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Sophie x<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-81862306985224553272018-03-26T13:54:00.002+01:002018-03-26T13:54:17.898+01:00Friendship.Friends are the most wonderful thing, but relationships with friends can also cause you the most stress and heartache.<br />
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Friendship is like any other relationship - there are two sides to the relationship, human relationships can be tricky and there will always be ups and downs.<br />
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I'm fiercely loyal when it comes to friendship, but that often leads to me putting way too much time and effort into relationships that potentially don't need or deserve it.<br />
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I'm been thinking about this post for a long time, writing and rewriting it, and I've decided in the end to share the ten lessons I've learned about friendship, particularly over the last four or five years since leaving university and entering the 'real world'.<br />
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<ol>
<li><b>Quality beats quantity </b>every single time. I have lots of people I enjoy spending time with, but have a tiny circle who I'd actually go to when I really need a certain kind of chat or support.</li>
<li>I<b>nvest in the relationships that really matter</b> to you. I have one friend (of over 10 years, hi Lissie) who I know I can literally speak to about anything and everything and therefore make sure I set aside good chunks of time for a good old catch up, making it a priority.</li>
<li><b>Friends can come from the most unlikely places</b>. My friendships have all come from completely different places, and you never know when that new person you bump into could become a really important part of your life.</li>
<li><b>Different friends have different roles</b>. There's the friend you like having a laugh with, the one you go to for honest advice, the one you discuss a particular hobby with, the one who has known you forever... enjoy the fact they're all different rather than trying to make each fit some kind of structure.</li>
<li><b>Friends are not councillors</b>. By all means have a good heart to heart or ask for advice, but on't try to rely on them to solve all of your problems, and make sure you listen to them as much as they listen to you. </li>
<li><b>Friends drift apart.</b> Or just change in general. An acquaintance could end up being a much closer friend, and someone you speak to all the time could become someone you just catch up with every few months. There's nothing wrong with that.</li>
<li><b>Be yourself and be honest</b>. This one is twofold: be honest with your friends and don't put on an act, but also be honest about how you feel around that person. If someone makes you feel bad about yourself, or you don't feel fully yourself around them, it's ok to pull back a bit.</li>
<li><b>Be a good friend</b>. There's no point moaning about or worrying about the way your friends treat you if you're not being a good friend to them. You be the friend you wish you had. That way, you'll attract great friends into your life. </li>
<li><b>Get the balance right</b>. Whilst friendships aren't transactional in the traditional sense, it does matter that there's an overall balance of give and take. If one side is doing all of the giving and the other is just soaking up all the benefits, over time that will cause problems. There will always be periods where one friend needs more support than another and that's totally fine, but over a long period of time it should roughly balance.</li>
<li><b>Be a good friend to yourself</b>. Don't rely on getting all the support and entertainment you need from outside sources. Be your own friend and be kind to yourself, too. </li>
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Sophie x</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-69417892492533560512018-03-25T08:39:00.001+01:002018-03-25T08:39:07.030+01:00Wandering in the woodsYesterday, we spent the morning wandering the woods and it's left me in such a good frame of mind.<br />
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There was a viral tweet a good number of months ago now which was something along the lines of 'the things I hated as a kid, I love as an adult'. It gave examples of things like early nights and long walks.<br />
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For me, this couldn't be more true.<br />
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When I was younger, the weekend suggestion of 'going for a walk' was one of the most unappealing things I could hear.<br />
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Yesterday, we actively chose to hunt out a nice country park or area of woodland for a nice Spring walk.<br />
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We settled on a short drive over to the Wirral, to Royden Park, next to Thurtsaston Common. To be perfectly honest, I don't know what was the park and what was the common, but I know we did a good walk taking in both!<br />
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It was an accidental circular walk, following our noses through the woods.<br />
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The skies were blue, and the air was cool but not cold. There was that amazing smell of trees and forest ad ground that's recently been rained on.<br />
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There was mud all over our shoes but it didn't matter.<br />
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There were dogs running everywhere, every owner offering a smiley hello.<br />
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I felt calm.<br />
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Calm, relaxed and happy.<br />
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It reminded me that it's something we should do much more often. Just wander, stroll, be in nature and not have a time limit or a purpose.<br />
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The conversation meandered all over the place, and at other times we were just quiet.<br />
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I was one of my favourite Saturdays so far this year and it's made me really look forward to the days getting warmer and brighter.<br />
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We all need to switch off, sometimes.<br />
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Sophie x<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-65650675790195586572018-03-23T12:45:00.003+00:002018-03-23T12:47:21.924+00:00Quadrophenia, NK Theatre Arts<b>As regular readers will know, I've raved multiple times about NK Theatre Arts, a group based in Romiley. I wasn't able to attend their latest show, Quadrophenia (which I'm gutted about), but my dad (<a href="https://twitter.com/BarrieHawker" target="_blank">Barrie Hawker</a>) went, loved it, and has written this brilliant review to share with you all...</b><br />
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This is one of the standout lines from Quadrophenia, a rock musical staged by NK Theatre Arts in Romiley, which I had the privilege of seeing last night. And it was quite some musical and it did indeed stand out.<br /><br />I’ve seen a few shows here over the past year and have always been mightily impressed by the talent on show. The performers are all local and they are all amateur, something I had to keep reminding myself of last night when the singing was so brilliant, the choreography so mesmeric, the band so amazing and the acting, well in my opinion, first class. Can you tell I enjoyed it?<br /><br /><br />Well I say enjoyed, perhaps a better word might be experienced, because an experience is exactly what it was. When Jimmy, superbly played by Jake Ridgeway, was standing a few yards from me, singing ‘Is it me, for a moment’, I felt totally immersed in Jimmy’s world and moved to a stray tear as a result.<br /><br />For those somewhat younger than I am, Quadrophenia began life as an album by The Who in the mid-seventies. A film grew out of this and it was just five years ago that NK Theatre Arts gained the permission of Pete Townshend to bring their interpretation of the album to life on stage as a rock musical. With the people at NK celebrating their 30-year anniversary, this year felt to them like the right time to revisit the show and I for one am extremely grateful that they did.<br /><br /><br />The story itself is not for the faint-hearted – Jimmy, the main character, is having a tough time. His parents aren’t exactly supportive, his ‘girlfriend’ prefers his mate who’s got an office job, and Jimmy feels let down by his idol who switches from Ace Face to Bell Boy, as Jimmy’s life follows a downward spiral towards destruction.<br /><br />And Jimmy’s head doesn’t help him that much either. Inside there he is haunted by three alter egos; one a little crazy, one somewhat violent and one erring more towards the romantic and hopeful. He uses alcohol and pills to try and take the edge off things, but this way more darkness lies, and real answers prove hard to come by.<br /><br />Jimmy is a mod, by the way, so he wears jeans and a parka and drives a scooter with lots of mirrors. This leads him into violent confrontation with rockers, notably at the seafront in Blackpool, where he also links up with Sandy, only to see her walk off later with one of his mod ‘mates’.<br /><br /><br />To say the show was intense would be something of an understatement. And to say the players were passionate would be damning with faint praise. Jimmy’s journey is full on, and the way it is played out on stage is, at times quite literally, in your face.<br /><br />I’ve already mentioned Jake Ridgeway who plays Jimmy, but I’m going to have to mention him again. His voice moves from the tender to the raucous, the whispery to the raw, the low to the very high, all within the blink of an eye. His acting is top notch too, taking centre stage and pretty much owning centre stage throughout the production. A word in praise of his movement too. Jimmy has to stagger around quite a lot in this show, as he stumbles from one tragic scene to another. But he did this in different ways and in credible ways each and every time; no mean feat that.<br /><br /><br />I am assuming that some, if not all of this, will have been guided by choreographer Hannah Gorst who definitely deserves a huge amount of praise for the way the whole cast moves around in the show. This sometimes includes actual dance moves but is often based around players interacting with one another through a simple touch, a gentle shove or a full-blown punch in some of the more violent but again utterly believable parts of the show.<br /><br />Then, of course, there was the band. And what a band it was too, not least when performing My Generation at the end of the show, when I swear it was Keith Moon on those drums and not someone claiming he was called John Patterson. Dominic Stannage is deserving of much praise here too – not only for his musical direction, but also for his singing and guitar-playing. Great job.<br /><br /><br />Whilst it’s often easy to pick out key performers in leading roles, I have to emphasise that this was clearly a team effort from start to finish. And this goes for the staging, the lighting, the sound, the set, the full working scooters to boot. As with many a top show, then, the whole was greater than the sum of its parts. During the many emotionally charged scenes in the show, you could pick out any cast member and see the passion in their eyes and the utter conviction in their performance.<br /><br />This was never more present than when watching Jimmy’s three alter egos, Russell Hampson, Jack Townson and Luke Viney. These three are on stage pretty much throughout the show too, and their performances were all totally engaging. As for their singing, well let’s just say it was right up there with the best of the many shows I’ve seen in Manchester and on the West End.<br /><br />I guess the director deserves a wee mention here too(!) – I believe much of this was her idea in the first place five years ago! Well hats off to you Kerry Day, this show was utterly brilliant.<br /><br /><br />Before I saw this show, I have to admit to thinking it was going to be based around a film I fondly recall being brought to life on stage, with a few songs I vaguely remember from the distant past. And to an extent I guess that’s what it vaguely was. But this production delivered so much more than my preconceived ideas of what it might be and how it might be.<br /><br />Yes, it was based around mods and rockers and yes it was based around that film I saw. But this was just the beginning and one could argue, almost irrelevant. And anyway, this was Blackpool, not Brighton, the seaside but with true northern grit.<br /><br />And this was the journey of someone who could have been me and might have been you. The themes in this show are dark and at times very depressing. This man’s journey into darkness is almost King Lear-like in its descent. And we can take the ending in whichever we’d like. <br /><br /><br />Jimmy may have seen the back of his alter egos and as he sings the heart-rending and brilliant Love Reign O’er Me, we can all try and believe that love has indeed taken o’er. But what will this mean to the Jimmy/The Everyman of the future? <br /><br />Cue the sequel Kerry Day, which way now? <div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
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<b>Thanks, Dad, for the guest post!</b><br />
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<b>Sophie x</b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-70681707715149037002018-03-21T12:30:00.001+00:002018-03-21T12:30:19.863+00:00It's a numbers game - mental health updateI recently shared that I was seeking more help for my mental health, for the next stage in my recovery. If you want the background <a href="http://what-sophie-said.blogspot.co.uk/2018/02/mental-health-update-back-to-doctor-but.html" target="_blank">it's here</a>, but today I want to talk about another stage in the journey.<br />
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Last week, I had a call from the local mental health service, to assess exactly what support I needed. In case you're interested, it will be another round of intensive CBT for a period of 12 to 20 sessions. I had been waiting 6 weeks for that assessment call and the wait is predicted to be around 4 months until the sessions begin.<br />
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All this got me thinking about the reality of the waiting game that is waiting for help with your mental health. I'm incredibly fortunate to have always been in a position where I'm surrounded by support from friends and family, and the help I HAVE had from GPs and therapists has, for the most part, been outstanding.<br />
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However, we hear all the time how under-resourced our mental health services are, and I thought that today I'd give a bit of a breakdown of some of the numbers that outline my journey over the past few years.<br />
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It's a bit of a different style of post for me, but I thought it could be interesting for those who haven't had to go through these processes to see the waiting game that can make up a large part of the process of getting help with your mental health.<br />
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My numbers are specific to me, and I've read about plenty of people who have had both far longer and far shorter waits than me. These are just some of MY numbers.<br />
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5 years - since the time my anxiety first became a big player in my day to day life, to the point that I needed professional help<br />
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4.5 years - since the dentist trip that began my issues with food, which I'm still working on and trying to find the answers to today<br />
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4 days - the amount of time I spent in bed when my anxiety first hit hard, thinking I had a stomach bug due to the physical effects<br />
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5 - the number of GPs I've seen along the journey - 3 of whom went above and beyond<br />
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4 - the number of different counsellors I've seen, a mixture of both NHS and private. I credit one of those with beginning to really turn my life around<br />
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12 - the number of CBT sessions I had with an amazing NHS counsellor in London<br />
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6 months - the amount of time I moved back home for, after leaving London, for family time, yoga, dentist trips and a lot of self care and recovery time<br />
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20 months - since the 'rock bottom' that signalled my decision to completely change things, rather than continuing to put a sticking plaster over my issues<br />
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1 year - since the day I realised my health anxiety no longer sent me into a state of absolute panic at the mere mention of somebody else feeling ill<br />
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8 months - since moving out of my parents' house again and starting my next chapter in a beautiful new home<br />
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32 - the number of new foods I've managed to try in the past year, after ruthlessly cutting things out of my diet for fear they would make me ill - none made me ill, and I really enjoyed 31 out of the 32!<br />
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3 - the number of times I've gone to see a doctor on my own since moving here, every single one without having a panic attack<br />
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Every day is a new day and a new chance for progress. I've learned that support is all around me, whether from the medical profession or the world around me.<br />
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The waiting is difficult, but I've slowly built up a tool kit of things that continue to help me every single day when it comes to looking after my mental health.<br />
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I'm learning to lean on other people when I need them, and to accept help rather than keeping everything in.<br />
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I'm learning to cope with stressful situations without automatically assuming I'll never be able to get through them because of anxiety and depression.<br />
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Every day is another step out of the dark periods and towards a healthier future.<br />
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I have my harder days, but the person I am today couldn't be more different to the way I was five years ago, or three, or even one year ago.<br />
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Sophie x<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-526936023265501692018-03-15T11:13:00.003+00:002018-03-15T11:13:52.406+00:00The Reading List #51I've fallen into a pattern of including two fiction and two non-fiction books in each of these round-ups, and I think I like it. For a long time I said I wasn't a non-fiction kind of people, but times have changed and I'm really enjoying reading more of a variety.<br />
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Here's some of the latest things I've been reading:<br />
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<u>Eating Animals, Jonathan Safran Foer</u><br />
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Foer spent three years immersing himself in the world of animal agriculture, to find out how the industry really worked behind the scenes and to work out his own opinion on related topics. This book is the culmination of that research and exploration.<br />
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This book is hugely informative and very readable. The narrative style is very friendly and there are chapters written by vegans, farmers, factory farmers and others involved at all stages of the agricultural industry. Some of those shared views that were completely unexpected so it made for interesting reading. There are some quite extreme views and examples shared, but a voice is given to a range of representatives from across the whole industry.<br />
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<u>The Novel in the Viola, Natasha Solomons</u><br />
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In Spring 1938, Elise moves from Vienna to Tyneford, an English home, to become a parlour maid. The war is coming and the whole world is shifting and changing. Including beautiful family letters, it's a story of love, family and change.<br />
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This novel was just lovely. Elise is a real fish out of water, baffled by lots of English customs and trying to pave her own path. It offers a fresh perspective of the war through a new pair of eyes - this story is slightly removed from all that is happening on the world stage yet at the same time completely involved and affected by it.<br />
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<u>Happy - Why more or less of everything is absolutely fine, Derren Brown</u><br />
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This book is a study of happiness. A sweeping exploration of theories and views on happiness throughout the ages, Brown puts forward the view that there is too much focus on trying to shape our own destinies and the need to be in constant pursuit of 'happiness'.<br />
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I had been really looking forward to reading this, but I've got to admit I wasn't really a fan. It felt very long-winded and delivered something quite different to what I felt was suggested from the blurb and opening pages. It was a study of the history of happiness theory more than it was anything else. I think a part of my frustration also came from the fact he was writing off and rubbishing a lot of ideas and techniques that actually have helped both me and others I know a lot. Whilst I agree none of them are a miracle cure to happiness, I felt some of the statements made were far too sweeping.<br />
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<u>The Book of Lost and Found, Lucy Foley</u><br />
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In London, 1986, Kate is bequeathed an old portrait. In Paris, 1939, Alice and Thomas meet again after ten years, both much changed. He is now an artist.<br />
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It's a very beautiful novel, with a lot of jumping around between time periods. The differences between the three time periods were very clear, so it didn't get confusing. The story is a love story which sweeps through the decades and keeps you guessing. I did wish I could learn more about some of the characters - I could happily read a whole novel on Alice, which I guess is a sign of how strong the characterisation is! I was less interested in the character of Kate, but on reflection she acts as more of a storytelling device, and a way to move the story through the years. It wasn't without a couple of flaws, but it's a really lovely, engaging read.<br />
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So there we have my latest round up of mini reviews - more will be on the way shortly...<br />
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Sophie x<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-88856519031097969392018-02-26T21:50:00.001+00:002018-02-26T21:50:14.730+00:00Pressing repeatIt's not unusual for the human mind to get hooked onto certain things. We find a song we like and play it until we groan every time the opening bars play. We find a food we love and eat it until we get bored of the taste.<br />
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No level of 'obsession' in this way is a good thing. You end up sick of the situation, or the thing, or the item. You get no variety in your diet or your playlists or your style of workout.<br />
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The same is true when we get our thoughts stuck on a loop.<br />
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Pressing repeat on certain thoughts or emotions, which often happens subconsciously, is not a healthy space for your head to be in.<br />
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Over the past couple of years I've been making more of a proactive effort to catch myself when I'm falling into old habits of letting thoughts repeat on a loop. It's been a huge focus throughout my treatments for anxiety over the last four or five years and something I've been working hard at.<br />
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Whenever I'm more stressed or more tired, those techniques can end up flying out the window and I find myself stuck in thought loops which are helping me in no way at all.<br />
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A couple of weeks ago, I was frustrated about a particular situation in my life, but instead of taking steps to change it, I trapped myself in a cycle of thinking about it over and over again. Talking about it over and over again. Ranting about it over and over again.<br />
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Once you're in that cycle, every single time you rant about the issue without doing anything about it, you end up more and more and more frustrated. Not only are you doing nothing to improve the situation, but you're actively making yourself feel even worse.<br />
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Every time I pressed repeat I would get more and more stressed. Once you're doing that about one problem, it very quickly filters out into other areas and you suddenly get very worked up about other issues that normally you could just brush aside.<br />
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It's not a healthy cycle and it's not a good place to be.<br />
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I had to really stop and tell myself the whole reason this was happening is because I was doing nothing to stop it. It was no longer about any of the external factors, it was now entirely about the way I was reacting to it and the fact I was doing nothing to alter it.<br />
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I made a list of the steps that needed to be taken to sort out the (now multiple) situations I was feeling stressed about, and I started to DO them.<br />
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Sometimes, that means getting out of your comfort zone or having awkward conversations, but the price of avoiding those things is even worse.<br />
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The only way to break that cycle is for YOU to take action and make that change.<br />
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Sophie x<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-31814656867649005812018-02-20T19:50:00.002+00:002018-02-20T19:53:45.301+00:00Swan Lake, St Petersburg Classic Ballet, Storyhouse ChesterI've wanted to see Swan Lake for years and years, and over the weekend at Storyhouse I had my chance.<br />
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Presented by the St Petersburg Classic Ballet, Tchaikovsky's iconic music was brought to life for a couple of performances at the wonderful Chester venue.<br />
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We were sitting right at the top of the Gallery, which I have to admit was a perfect position from which to view a ballet - we could see all the formations and dances from above, but the layout and clever tiering at Storyhouse meant we didn't feel far from the action.<br />
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I also enjoyed being able to see straight into the orchestra pit, as when it comes to watching a ballet, the music is just as important as the movement.<br />
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Maybe the orchestra is where I will start: I was so impressed. The full orchestra created a wonderfully balanced sound and the familiar music filled the auditorium beautifully. I want to particularly mention the clarinet player, who had some brilliant lead moments.<br />
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There were also some standout dancers. As there's no cast list readily available, I'll just refer to the character names. The principle dancer in the role of Odette, or the Queen of the Swans, was breathtaking. Her movements looked effortless and her elegance was that which you'd imagine when you're a child thinking of a perfect, beautiful ballerina.<br />
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When it came to the male dancers, both the Jester and Baron Von Rothbart were danced superbly, topped off by their excellent costumes which only enhanced the dancing even more.<br />
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Despite these highlights, though, the performance felt a little unpolished, or unfinished. This was such a shame as the three of us all went with such high hopes ready to be completely blown away, and in fact we had a lovely afternoon but were left feeling a tiny bit flat about elements of the show.<br />
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One example that comes to mind is that the image I associate with Swan Lake is one of complete uniformity, and the elegance of the swans all moving as one. In Saturday's performance, the precision was there through the bodies, but there were a few dances where the heads of the dancers were then all at different angles. When you're expecting things to be so polished, details like that really stand out.<br />
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I also struggled to enjoy the dancing of Prince Siegfried, who came across as if he was marking - that is, going through the moves but at about 60% of full capacity. It was as if he was conserving his energy, doing beautiful leaps but then not finishing his moves fully. This had an impact in the final scene, where a combination of the slightly lacklustre feel of the Princes movements combined with slightly disappointing choreography didn't make it feel like a huge final battle, and I was baffled as to how the Prince could ever be considered to have won that duel!<br />
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The final slightly odd moment was the pause halfway through the first Act. The curtains came down for so long that people were wondering whether there was an early interval or if something had gone wrong. There was probably about four minutes with the curtain down and no orchestra, during which we could hear all the dancers moving around and what sounded like a bit of a clunky scene change.<br />
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Despite these moments, I did have a wonderful afternoon. I'm so pleased I've finally seen Swan Lake and most of the performance was absolutely beautiful. It's just a shame that those elements took away a little of the shine, making us feel like we'd seen the show at 90%, rather than a 100% polished performance.<br />
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Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-56127187452906807522018-02-19T21:02:00.001+00:002018-02-19T21:02:04.998+00:00Mental health update: back to the doctor (but it's a good thing!)I went through a long period of feeling like asking for help meant I had failed.<br />
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And that asking for MORE help because I hadn't yet had enough was greedy, or an example I had failed even more.<br />
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Both of those beliefs were wrong.<br />
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One thing I've been consciously working on so far in 2018 is asking for and accepting help.<br />
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A couple of weeks ago, I went back to the doctor to chat about my mental health once more.<br />
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For some context, I finished my last period of counselling in December 2016, which is when I left London and moved back up north. My counsellor was brilliant and I made huge progress, but with the amount of issues I had to work through I had been told from day one I was likely to need more than one 12 week course of sessions. For more on those sessions, <a href="http://what-sophie-said.blogspot.co.uk/2017/07/counselling-via-nhs-part-1-doctor.html" target="_blank">head right this way</a>, where I've shared about that experience in full.<br />
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When I finished my final session, the counsellor suggested a period of a few months over which I would continue putting into practice the techniques we had learned, as over time some of my issues would improve with practice. It would then be clearer what I needed more help on.<br />
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Anyway, time passed and after six months of time with my family and lots of yoga, meditation, exercise, eating well and personal development work, I moved to Chester. My first six months there flew by, and suddenly that break of a few months had turned into a year.<br />
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Over that year, a lot has changed. My health anxiety has come on so far, to the point it rarely affects me at all. I'm getting more comfortable in cars for long journeys and I've got more of a social life than I've had probably since university.<br />
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For the first time in years, I'm throwing myself into things and really enjoying life.<br />
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That doesn't mean every day is easy. Although I'm now able to do so much more, I find myself getting very overwhelmed. I can be busy, but when I then pause it's as if my brain hasn't quite caught up with the fact I'm doing so much better. There are also some issues, such as my eating and my thoughts about a particular nasty incident that happened to me in London, that I could really do with some help on.<br />
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So I'm enjoying everything, then have a nice day off and spend it fretting about the fact I'm so busy and what if that affects my anxiety... but when I've been DOING the actual things I'm no longer having the constant fear and panic attacks.<br />
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There's a gap between where I'm at and where my brain has realised I'm up to, and I need help with that overwhelm.<br />
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I want to make sure that I'm not spending two weeks having a great time, then needing three days of total switch off just because there's a part of me which still tells myself I need to 'recover' from living a normal, busy, happy life.<br />
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So that help is exactly what I've asked for.<br />
<br />
<br />
My phone assessment is in about a month, and then hopefully I'll have an experience as positive as my one in London, with a counsellor who can help me work through these feelings that are still causing the obstacles I have left.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mental health is never going to be a straight line; we'll all experience ups and downs, and when you get to a point as low as I had hit it was always going to take a long time to re-stabilise.<br />
<br />
There's absolutely no shame in asking for help, and what I've learned is that the sooner you ask for help, the better.<br />
<br />
The sooner you can start getting to know your own mind, the sooner you can learn to deal with the harder days.<br />
<br />
<br />
So I'm back on the waiting list for further help. But it's a really, really positive step.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sophie x<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-53326719824394588212018-02-08T16:18:00.000+00:002018-02-08T16:18:58.241+00:00Time blitzesIf you asked a lot of people I've spent time with over the years, both in and out of school and beyond, they'd probably agree that I was an organised person. I've always done well at creating that illusion.<br />
<br />
The truth is, I really battle with myself most days to get anything done at all.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've always wanted to get things done, not let people down and do everything to the best of my ability, but inside my mind there is a master procrastinator.<br />
<br />
Don't get me wrong, some things I don't struggle to get done. There might be an immovable deadline or something of huge importance; if there's absolutely no choice or a clear deadline, I'll get that thing done.<br />
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As soon as there's some uncertainty, the desire to be efficient starts to duel with the master procrastinator.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've tried lots of things over the years to help, but this year decided things really needed to change. I'm juggling multiple jobs and responsibilities across many areas of my life, and if I don't stay on top of things I'll end up in a bit of a pickle. I don't have one boss or body that oversees it all and can keep me in check... apart from myself.<br />
<br />
<br />
Enter: the time blitz.<br />
<br />
<br />
Over the last month or so, I've been playing with the idea of having short blocks of time where I work at the fastest pace possible to tick off those really satisfying jobs that are great to tick but easy to delay.<br />
<br />
If I've walked home listening to a podcast and there's 15 minutes left, I'll clean as much of the front room as I can. Or I'll set myself a 10 minute timer to wash up and clean the kitchen. A 20 minute timer to draft that blog post.<br />
<br />
There's no magic to this idea and I'm sure it's been suggested to me by multiple sources, but these things don't work unless you ACTUALLY implement them.<br />
<br />
<br />
I was also recently reminded of the amazing quote 'tasks expand to fill the time you have', which is so true!<br />
<br />
If you've only got 30 minutes to get something essential done, you'll do it, but if you have two hours it can take you that long.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's still a work in progress, as my natural instinct is to add things to a list and do them later.<br />
<br />
But there's been a definite shift in the way I'm using my time, and over time I'm convinced I can completely change my time management skills.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sophie x<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-10076287364166481002018-02-07T17:22:00.001+00:002018-02-07T17:22:34.658+00:00The Reading List #50This reading list is a real mixture: a thriller, an old favourite, mental health and a study on the position of young men in today's society. I'm continuing to enjoy always having both fiction and non-fiction on the go, so this post definitely reflects that.<br />
<br />
Here are my latest four reads...<br />
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<u><br /></u>
<u>Five Quarters of the Orange, Joanne Harris</u><br />
<br />
I first read this book years ago, but always knew I would return to it as the writing is so beautiful. Framboise's nephew is trying to use her success, built upon recipes she inherited from her mother. From this starting point, the novel falls into a story of wartime childhood, a mother deteriorating fast and a pivotal tragedy. There's also some extracts from her mother's journal and notebooks throughout to add another layer to the narrative.<br />
<br />
There are running themes of food, family and growing up, but beneath that is the lurking threat of illness and of German occupation. It's just a beautifully written novel, with some great observational passages. I also really enjoyed the maturation of the voice of Framboise from being a young girl to an older woman.<br />
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<u>Mad Girl, Bryony Gordon</u><br />
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From the minute I heard the Telegraph columnist was going to be releasing this book, I knew I needed to read it. She tells the story of her life so far living with OCD, alopecia and addiction amongst other things, alongside the amazing high points of her life and career. There's a healthy balance of sharing her struggles and her successes.<br />
<br />
It's such an honest, raw book, with brilliant writing and it's laced with humour throughout. Granted, some of the humour is pretty dark humour, but she tells her story in a very relatable way. I personally could relate to parts of her story that aligned with my own, and found other bits purely interesting, but I also think it would be an excellent introduction for those who have had no experience of or exposure to these topics. Well worth a read.<br />
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<br />
<br />
<u>Into the Water, Paula Hawkins</u><br />
<br />
WARNING: You won't be able to put this book down.<br />
<br />
Nell is dead, another life lost to The Drowning Pool, but her sister Jules knows she would never have jumped. It's been a while since I picked up a true page turner that really kept me guessing. It's fascinating, keeps you guessing and has great characters. I enjoyed the themes of the ominous nature of the water, group fear and local legends. The novel is told in short, choppy chapters from multiple perspectives, and ticks my boxes for a very readable thriller.<br />
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<br />
<br />
<u>Man (Dis)Connected - How the digital age is changing young men forever, Philip Zimbardo and Nikita D. Coulombe</u><br />
<br />
This was a really interesting read on a topic that's often popped into my mind. I've wondered about the younger generations in general and how the digital world is going to affect them in the long term, but this work focuses particularly on men.<br />
<br />
It dives quite deep and contains lots of surveys and case studies, which enjoy when it's a topic I've not really explored before. One particularly interesting point made at the start is that there has been no cohesive men's movement alongside women's movements to teach young men how to act in this updated, modern society. That's what this book tries to address. At times, I thought the solutions offered were a little too idealistic and I couldn't see how they'd be achieved in practice, but I really enjoyed all the theory.<br />
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<br />
At the moment I've ended up with about four books on the go, so more updates will come soon...<br />
<br />
Sophie x<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-14992768372736907122018-02-03T20:47:00.005+00:002018-02-03T20:47:54.512+00:00Accountability partnersI've never really done the whole 'accountability partner' thing before.<br />
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Truth be told, I don't like being told what to do. I've also always been the best at keeping in touch out of most of my friends so it would always have been me doing that chasing for check-ins.<br />
<br />
On a related note, I've never quite been on the same path at the same time as any of my friends. Certainly not aligned enough to be true accountability partners and understand each other's goals and motivations.<br />
<br />
<br />
Because being an accountability partner isn't just about cheering your friends on or having a bit of a catch up; it's about pushing one another forwards and helping each other to be honest about what we're actually doing and whether or not that's best serving us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Enter Emily.<br />
<br />
Emily and I went to primary school together, and this time last year ended up getting back in touch and realised we're in very similar places mentally, with goals that are very different but fit into the same creative spaces.<br />
<br />
The conversations go on for hours, and the honesty is there.<br />
<br />
<br />
At the beginning of January, we were having the usual post-Christmas catch up and each listed our goals or plans for the coming year.<br />
<br />
We had some overlaps, and then we each had some totally different goals of our own.<br />
<br />
Emily suggested we be accountability partners, and keep each other on track through the year.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not going to lie, my initial reaction was no thanks! As I've mentioned before, I hate being told what to do. If I was already planning to do something and then someone reminds me to do it, it drives me up the wall. It's something that has always frustrated me about myself.<br />
<br />
Then I thought about it again and remembered the phrase 'nothing changes if you keep on doing the same thing you've always been doing'.<br />
<br />
I trust Emily, I'm honest with her, and she understands my goals. The same is true the other way round (I like to think so, anyway).<br />
<br />
So why not give it a try?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yesterday, we had our first monthly check in and it felt good.<br />
<br />
I didn't feel like I was being nagged, it was just an open and honest conversation about where we were up to and what we wanted to change.<br />
<br />
It's left me feeling really positive.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've definitely been experiencing bigger and bigger mindset shifts recently in terms of my motivation and productivity, and I think this is another step on that same path.<br />
<br />
We're into month two of 2018, and so far it's shaping up to be a good one.<br />
<br />
<br />
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Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-76778642955690182522018-02-02T20:47:00.003+00:002018-02-02T20:47:58.678+00:00The Play That Goes Wrong, Storyhouse ChesterI can't remember the last time I laughed so solidly throughout a show before this Tuesday.<br />
<br />
The UK tour of The Play That Goes Wrong swept into Storyhouse in Chester this week, and it more than delivered the hilarity the posters promised.<br />
<br />
<br />
Let me start by saying I love a show that gets the audience involved before the show even begins. The stage managers and director were all over the auditorium, a member of the audience was pulled up to help fix the set, and the atmosphere of excitement was rippling across the stalls before curtain up arrived.<br />
<br />
I'm not usually the biggest fan of this style of humour - slapstick, quite 'silly' humour - but for one evening my mind was changed. I think I've usually only seen this kind of thing on TV, but seeing it on stage gave me a whole new sense of appreciation because you realise just how difficult it must be to have so much 'go wrong'. From stunts to collapsing sets to unconscious actors, there was so much going on which demanded flawless timing and a lot of training and talent.<br />
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The Cornley Polytechnic Drama Society is putting on a murder mystery, but it doesn't take long for things to start going, well, a bit wrong. The casts' determination is all that pulls them through to the play's conclusion, and they come up with some pretty ingenious ways to just keep going, at whatever cost.<br />
<br />
The play in a play idea is always a fun place to start, as every character immediately has both the motivations of their own character and the character they're playing in the murder mystery itself, and sometimes the two cross over. The cast is made up both of the performers in the murder mystery and some members of the backstage crew.<br />
<br />
Usually, in a review, I pick out a few cast members to focus on in particular, but I really struggled with this show as it's such a strong ensemble number - I couldn't choose anyone to speak about in isolation. Instead, I decided to pick out some of my favourite moments or features of the play (without major plot spoilers).<br />
<br />
<br />
Some of my favourite moments were moments of silence, in which the characters were trying to figure out what on earth to do next. For example, in one scene all limbs are occupied holding up parts of the set and then the telephone rings. The silences lasted a great amount of time and you could almost see the cogs whirring in the actors' brains.<br />
<br />
The deterioration of the raised study area (with the unwanted pot plant!) was a clear cause of lots of laughter, which I don't think needs any more explanation than that. If you've seen the show, you know.<br />
<br />
One of my favourite moments in the script itself was when the murder mystery script got into a bit of a pickle. With one character forgetting a line, those in the scene were stuck on a loop, repeating one page again and again. I've definitely been in plays where this has happened!<br />
<br />
I think that's why I found it extra funny: I've been in many an amateur production. Which means I've witnessed pretty much all of these things before! Yes, the show takes it to the extreme, but it's all based on things that really can and do go wrong, which I think adds an extra layer of chuckles for anyone who has spent any time in the wonderful world of theatre.<br />
<br />
<br />
The one element that took away from the overall shine slightly was that in the final ten to fifteen minutes of the show, I was ready for it to end. I'd loved the show and laughed the whole way through but in those final scenes I felt it went on just one step too long, or took things just one step further than necessary. Maybe it would have helped if there had been a more gradual escalation of disasters. It did build, but it built very quickly so the second act had far less progression and was more on one level.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a minor gripe though, because overall I had the most wonderful evening. The audience reaction said it all: we were laughing out loud from start to finish. There were laughs, cheers and gasps throughout and the energy in the auditorium was just amazing.<br />
<br />
I'm really pleased I stepped out of my comfort zone and into the world of The Play That Goes Wrong.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sophie x<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205280483304703955.post-35851950623069501832018-02-01T13:31:00.000+00:002018-02-01T13:31:09.991+00:00Hello, February 2018 - Time to Talk DayWe are on our way to Spring!<br />
<br />
I've got to say, I didn't find January as slow and dreadful as lots of people seemed to be saying it was, but I'm not going to complain about the days getting longer and stepping closer to the warmer months.<br />
<br />
January was absolutely action-packed this year, full of family and friends and pushing myself out of my comfort zone.<br />
<br />
February is already looking pretty booked up, so I'm looking forward to doing more of the same.<br />
<br />
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<br />
I couldn't write a post today and not mention that it is Time to Talk Day 2018. I'm a huge fan of this day every year, because I cannot emphasise enough how important talking has been in my own mental health journey.<br />
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Whether it's been finding the right words to express my own struggle, opening up to a counsellor or using my own voice to begin conversations with others around me who have realised they need help, talking has been the essential ingredient.<br />
<br />
I'm not going to go into my story as so many will be telling theirs today, and mine is pretty well documented on this blog. What I will say is that talking matters.<br />
<br />
Never underestimate the power of reaching out and asking if somebody is ok.<br />
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They may not tell you all that's on their mind, but you've let them know there's a willing ear, and that may be everything they needed to know to carry on with their day.<br />
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Make the first move, reach out to those you care about and make sure no one is walking their path alone.<br />
<br />
Sophie xAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13396357507516736575noreply@blogger.com0