What Sophie Said

Hello, July. I’m really, really glad to see you. You’ve always been my favourite month, my birthday month, my happy month. June was really hard. In June I hit a brick wall when it came to my anxiety and depression and I had to press reset. I spent two weeks sleeping, reading, learning. I returned to work. I’m building up my food intake. I’m building healthy habits. I’m learning to cope. But it’s been a hard, hard month. There have been achievements during it and I’ve learned an awful lot, but I’m ready for the fresh feel of a new month. I’ve come out of June with a new outlook. Rather than masking my problems and pretending I’m fine, I need to tackle them properly. Fully. For good. Take on those deep-rooted issues I’ve spent three years just masking and ‘getting on with’. It’s been hard, and there’s a long road ahead, but long term these changes will make a huge difference to my health and my happiness. So, July. I’m glad to see you....

I’ve started a new thing over the past few months: replying to emails. I don’t mean work emails or emails from family – I of course already replied to those ones. I mean email newsletters. I’m signed up to the newsletters of a fair amount of writers and bloggers, all of whom write content I absolutely love to receive. They’re newsletters that I get excited about opening when they land in my inbox. A couple of months ago, I realised they’d never know how much I loved these letters to my inbox, emails which feel like they’re written only to me, unless I told them. So I told them. Laura Jane Williams wrote a good few months ago about a feeling of not being good enough. I can’t remember then context exactly but she’d realised this feeling and had chosen to approach those feelings differently. In a relatively short email, she had summed up all the emotions I had been feeling that same week: nerves, excitement, mixed together with a feeling of ‘who cares, anyway?’ ...

Before Christmas, one of my very favourite people Laura announced she was going to run the London Marathon.  It's maybe worth mentioning that after her half marathon she informed me she would never run ever again as the experience had been so dreadful! I find anyone who runs a marathon pretty amazing - it's such a mental challenge as well as a physical one, so I thought I'd ask her some questions in the lead-up to the big day. What on EARTH made you decide to run a marathon? I was contacted by one of the fundraising team at Francis House Children’s Hospice about 8 months ago, asking if I’d be interested in applying to take part in the London Marathon in April. I’m really not sure why, but I said yes!  I’m always up for a challenge and thought it would be a fantastic way for me to get fit, and tick something off my bucket-list, whilst raising money for a really good cause.  Have you always been the sporty / runner type?  Not at all! ...

Another thing I love about Christmas is the amount of parties and gatherings, and getting the chance to catch up with people you maybe see less often. Especially now, about 18 months after graduating, when the majority of my friends are only all in the same place for a relatively short time. On the 20th, we got started with a Christmassy evening at my house. House decorated... The baby sister and me Christmassed up... It was a relaxed festive evening with some of my favourites. And Max definitely won at Christmas with his Santa onesie. A couple of days later it was time for the annual Hawker Christmas Drinks. Glasses ready... Family ready... (Jess is pretty much my parents' third daughter so she's the extra brunette on these ones!) Mum and dad spent time perfecting what they've named the #champagneselfie And then Baz's Christmas Quiz turned the atmosphere competitive... ...

This is the first of three Christmassy blog posts: the build-up, the parties and the day itself.  I absolutely love Christmas, and it’s been such a busy festive period that it feels like the perfect way to get back into blogging ahead of the new year. I started to feel Christmassy this year on the day of a trip to The Ideal Home Show at Christmas with my mum.  The queue was enormous, but we were greeted at the door by a choir singing Christmas carols, santa and an elf in their sleigh, and it was snowing over the entrance. On arrival, we walked through a winter wonderland of Christmas trees guiding us in to the main exhibition hall. The stalls were divided into different sections, such as health and beauty, clothing, Christmas, home and garden.. and by far our favourite was food. We watched a few demos, and sampled plenty of foods and drinks - although we did decline a 10am bowl of curry! Having not really known what t...