What Sophie Said

24 sounds kind of grown up. Didn’t I turn 21 five minutes ago? This year has been a bit action-packed: new job, new city, new house… I cannot wait for a trip away at the weekend. I used to think 24 year-olds would be settled and have their whole lives sorted. I’ve done a lot of learning about myself this year. Those I’d count as the people I’m closest to now aren’t the same list as on my last birthday and that’s ok. I can’t believe it’s a year since my last birthday, one of my absolute favourites (think Wimbledon and amazing friends). Birthdays always feel like a fresh start, with new opportunities. I feel like this is going to be a big year. There are lots of things going on in my brain and lots of plans both arranged and with the potential to happen. I’m going to continue looking after myself. The last month has taught me how important that is. I want to continue exploring. There are so many places even just in the UK I’m desperate to see,...

May was about realising when I need a break. The week in Kent was a bit of a wake up call, reminding me how important it is sometimes to switch off from everything. The month ended with a beautiful evening at Lambeth Palace for a masquerade ball. And what about this month? The theatre trips are back, for a start, which is good because I'm having withdrawal symptoms! My dad's coming to visit so we can head to Funny Girl, and I'm also seeing Titanic the Musical later in the month. I saw an amateur production of it a few years ago and was really impressed, so I'm looking forward to seeing it in the West End, complete with one of my sister's friends as a cast member. There are films lined up that I want to see, including the new X Men and Race, plus the excitement of looking forward to my birthday month in July. I want June to be about enjoying the things I have lined up whilst remembering what I took away from Kent: the need to slow my mind down and try and...

The fifth month of the year has already joined us. As I always say, the past month has flown by. April began with the most beautiful, sunny weekend in Hertfordshire. I finally went to the Harry Potter Studio Tour , and had a day out at Paradise Wildlife Park . De Vere Theobalds Park Hotel was the setting for the weekend, and I had the most relaxing, wonderful time. Later in the month, my wonderful friend Laura  RAN THE LONDON MARATHON. I'm so, so proud of her, and was tracking her throughout the whole course, getting a little emotional when she'd done it. I also saw Disney's stunning new adaptation of The Jungle Book , and had plenty of lovely, relaxed meals out. It was an action-packed month, as usual, with these things joined by a busy month at work, and the final appointment of my 6-week intensive counselling course for my anxiety. In amongst all that, the month has just slipped by. May looks set to be a good one, too. I've got a few plans and evenin...

I'm glad you're here, April. March seemed to last a really, really long time. I've had a little blog break, just because I felt like I needed it. One of the most recent posts I did, Sticks and Stones, took a bit of courage to publish. It had been ready, waiting, for months but pressing publish meant telling people, including those close to me, how much that event had affected me. I'm glad I pressed 'go'. I think I needed to get it out. To make it clear how important it is to think before you speak. After that, I stepped back a bit. I wasn't feeling particularly motivated to write, so rather than force anything I just took some time to breathe. That's the luxury of having a space that is all mine. March was busy, as ever. Work has been busy, and theatre trips have featured, of course. The Maids was pretty spectacular, and Avenue Q was the delight I remembered from first seeing it about four or five years ago (reviews on both to come...). The...

You’ve come round quickly. January seemed to last for weeks on end, but February crept by without me really even noticing. I’ve had a fairly quiet month, mainly working then relaxing in good company. March is a busy one, this year. I’ve filled up my weekends with things I’m really looking forward to. There’s the day my mum is coming to London for food and museums and exhibitions. There are two shows in my diary. There’s an overnight stay in a place which looks beautiful and calm. We have a big event at work mid-month which I know will be a long day, but I’m interested to see how it all runs, as I hadn’t joined the company yet when it ran last year. I’ve started seeing a new counsellor. More to come on that soon, but those sessions will be another key feature of the month. We had our first appointment last week and I’m feeling good about it. Apart from that, there are catch-ups with friends lined up, and a couple of my favourite people have birthdays...

Hello, December. You’ve raced towards us, this year. I always look forward to December. I’m a summer girl through and through, but December holds a special place. It’s so Christmassy. Bright. Festive. Busy. Full of family. Full of friends. Full of excitement. I get an overwhelming mixture of emotions in December. I had a couple of strange ones. In one, I was home after my first term of university, where I wasn’t happy. That December/ January, my sister was really poorly. I didn’t like that year. In another, I felt nauseous. A lot. I was convinced I had some kind of bug, but couldn’t figure it out. Chewing gum (the minty taste) kept me going through social outings. That was third year of uni. A couple of months later, it became clear that had been the first signs of my anxiety taking hold. In another December, I was struggling, probably at one of the worst parts of my panicking. I had to leave the room during a family gathering. I ate next to nothing...

London is a busy place. It’s full of people, full of events, full of tourist attractions. Whether you’re a born and bred Londoner, or move to the capital for work, family, or a whole host of other reasons, there are so many people calling this place home. Since August, I’ve been one of them. I moved here for work, a week before starting my new job, and to say the few months since then have been a whirlwind would be an understatement. I can count on one hand the number of days I’ve had totally free, to do nothing at all. Don’t get me wrong, the things I’ve been doing have been my choice, and I’ve loved it, but sometimes I’m left wishing I had a bit more time to do nothing. What’s so silly about that thought is that it’s totally in my control. I don’t HAVE to book so many theatre trips, or arrange so many meals out, or catch up with three different people in a week. But there’s something about the pace of this city that makes you feel like if you don’t do things ...

Anyone who knows me will know how important this item is to me: Every year I have an A5 diary, with an entire page for each day, and it contains EVERYTHING. The amount of to-do lists I make inside these pages is obscene. You’ll see the spine is taped up; that’s because the cover fell off about four months into the year because of so much opening and closing and being thrown into every handbag. I love knowing what’s coming up, noting down friend’s birthdays. To-do lists. To-buy lists. To-visit lists. To-read and to-watch lists. I’d probably write lists of lists if I had the time and the space. When I was struggling the most with my anxiety, these lists had got what you might call ‘out-of-hand’. I would obsess over their contents, and panic when things weren’t ticked off. I’d feel so overwhelmed by the contents that it would be hard to focus on anything or do anything. So things wouldn’t get ticked off. And so began a vicious circle. Now...